I like to write about current stuff when the muse strikes. Well, I got struck by a funny muse today. One of my favorite trips each day is to the mailbox. Not because there’s always something of value or importance inside, but there’s usually something unknown inside.

In the mail today came a tri-fold piece of slick paper. It was not in an envelope. It was just a folded piece of paper with an address on it. It was addressed to “resident” at my address. Whoever sent this thing really knew me, didn’t they? No one, not even a total stranger, has ever called me “resident”.

Stamped boldly across the face of the address page were these words: “Personal And Confidential”. I was a bit astounded. Who in the world would send a truly “personal and confidential” message to someone named “resident” and not even put it in a privacy envelope?

The kicker came when I opened the tri-fold brochure. It was a “personal and confidential” invitation to join in a search for “love and fulfillment” in a singles’ club. A SINGLES’ CLUB? They asked a lot of questions designed to elicit very personal information about me.

I have to tell you something. I met my first wife when I was 16 and she was 15. We married in our early twenties and stayed married until she went Home to be with Jesus at the age of 39. Pat and I are coming up on our 19th anniversary. I have literally dated only two persons of the female species and married both of them. I’ve never had any desire to check out a singles’ club. I guess I’ve been too busy trying to make marriage work!

While this whole thing brought a grin to my face, and elicited a hearty laugh from Pat when I shared it with her, the more I thought about it, the more absolutely impersonal this “personal and confidential” message was. Could anyone be more impersonal than to load my mailbox with stuff addressed to an impersonal “resident” and hype it as “personal and confidential” communication?

As long as I’m on this subject, let’s think about calls from sales people. If they’re polite, I try to also be polite as I quickly get rid of them. If they behave like pit bulls with a deadly disease, I have an 18 inch model toilet I was given for Christmas a couple of years ago. I just put the phone down to the porcelain facility and flush the sales person away.

The kind of sales person that really gets to me is the one who pretends to be one of my best friends or a long-lost chum from my past. One of the key tipoffs is when they call me “Gerald”. Now, that is my legal first name. I was named after my favorite and only aunt, Geraldine. (I’ve always been very grateful that someone didn’t make my middle name “Dean”.) However, most all of my life I’ve been “Jerry” or some form of “Jerry”. Now, I’ve been called a lot of other things far less flattering, but hardly ever “Gerald”.

I know absolutely and for sure that whomever is calling is just trying to fake me out by pulling that sickeningly friendly, how-you-been-doing routine. I don’t mind calls from true friends. I recently hooked up with a brother and sister in the Lord who were part of establishing the second church we planted in the early 60’s. They can call, E-mail or write and their contact is always most welcome. We have a history. They know something about me. We have something in common that is worthy of resurrection.

Have you ever felt like you were a stranger to God? That somehow He is unaware that you exist? Would He send you a communication just marked “resident”? Oh, no, not hardly. He knew you before you were born, while you were still in your mother’s womb. He knows how many hairs are on your head. He even knows when a sparrow dies in your yard. He knows your body; He created it in a wonderful manner.

He desires to have a truly personal and confidential relationship with you. He listens to your prayer requests and praises. He never violates your confidence by telling other people what you’ve told Him. He cares deeply about how you live your life and the choices you make. Most of all, He cares about where you spend eternity. He’s a bit “selfish” in this regard. He wants you to spend forever with Him! He also wants you to bring as many folks to Heaven with you as you can possibly bring.

What Are The Life Lessons
For Us In This Piece?

• Don’t try to fake people out by pretending to be something you’re not.
• Don’t try to elude God by hiding behind the rather generic term, “resident”.
• Take advantage of all the beautiful things He has to offer you in this life and the life to come.

Next Inside Out          Gallery              Previous Inside Out